September 29, 2004


why? why this? why that? why anything? why do i do what i do? why do i neglect to do what i do? why do i desperately want to move on, but constantly find myself trying to move backwards? why did i decide my life, before knowing what i really want to do with it? why do i put myself first? why can't i just figure out myself? why do i think things that aren't true? why do so many feelings, sensations, and things have to remind me of pain? why do good things remind me of pain? why can't i take these pictures down? why can't i move on? why can't i stop chasing her, when i so badly need to? why is she so quick to move on? moreso how? why do i feel like shit; both physically and mentally? why am i here? why am i now? why not then? why not there? why not like laguna beach? why not like naperville? why like this? why do i make the decisions i make? why do i feel like i make the wrong ones constantly? why, if i know they're wrong, do i keep making them? why? why? why?

Posted by hollimer at September 29, 2004 2:16 AM | TrackBack
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