December 1, 2004

thongs and socks

she had dumps like a truck truck truck

so i was outside today... damn its cold, but thats not what i'm here to talk about. anyway, i was outside today and i look down and see a nasty looking thong wadded up on the ground. now, outside of champaign urbana, this might've been a bit more odd, but this isnt the first time i've seen underwear randomly in a parking lot or on the sidewalk or in the street. which got me thinking: how the hell does that happen? is there some chick walkin down the street who decides she needs to go commando right then and there? maybe it fell out of her laundry basket when she was going to the laundrymat? does she know that they're randomly out here, soaked from the rain and caked in dirt from the street? is it like the random unmatched sock you occassionally wind up with after a load of laundry? you ask yourself, "where the hell could your mate have gone?" why is it that we assume that some laundry elves came and stole one of our socks? if it was a case of stealing our socks, wouldnt they steal a pair so it would be less noticable? maybe thats what all that lint is in the dryer trap: 1 dissolved sock. maybe you arent missing a sock. maybe a sock some how materializes in the dryer. maybe you arent one short of a pair, but rather one sock richer. prepared for some evolutionary growth of a new foot or something. maybe that "missing" sock turned into a thong and walked out into the street and got hit by a car, thus explaining the seemingly random occurances of unmentionables on the streets of champaign.

keep your underwear on. or at least out of the streets.

Posted by hollimer at December 1, 2004 4:23 PM | TrackBack
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